Being An Encouragement When You are Feeling Discouraged

Your joy is your own; your bitterness is your own. No one can share them with you.” 

Proverbs 14:10 (GNT)

It has been a minute since I have written anything.

Being completely transparent, I have felt pretty discouraged lately.

Many thoughts and ideas have come and gone, but I have struggled to get them from my head onto the paper. 

How can I be an encouragement to others when I am feeling discouraged?

Just like a slow drift away from the shore line, I have felt myself moving further and further away from where I want to be.

More importantly, where He wants me to be.

Maybe I am not the only one.

Whether it is a series of small changes or one large shift, sometimes it can feel like we are treading water and no one seems to notice.

And even though our minds are racing to get back to the shore, our bodies feel paralyzed to move.

But God.

When it feels like no one understands, He does.

Insert our recent Bible Study on the book of Proverbs.

One verse in particular challenged me and left me with questions.

Here are some different translations for Proverbs 14:10 –

“The heart knows its own bitterness,

    and no stranger shares its joy.” (ESV)

“The person who shuns the bitter moments of friends will be an outsider at their celebrations.” (MSG)

“Only the person involved can know his own bitterness or joy— no one else can really share it.” (TLB)

“No one else can know your sadness.

 Strangers cannot share your joy.”  (ICB)

“Your joy is your own; your bitterness is your own. No one can share them with you.” (GNT)

That singular verse sparked much discussion.

Don’t we share in the joys and the sorrows of our friends and loved ones?

Certainly a stranger cannot share in our joys.

If we do not stand by someone in their troubled times, it makes sense that we should not share in their celebrations, right?

As our group dug deeper into these translations, we came across some commentaries that made sense.

Simply put, no one knows us like God.

Not our friends, not our family.

Even the people closest to us cannot know how we feel all of the time.

Even when we are feeling adrift.

Only God fully knows the depths of our pain and the fullness of our joy.

Some friends come to us in our youth, others as we age.

Family members play different roles in different seasons of our lives.

A parent brings us through childhood, and if we are fortunate sees us becoming an adult.

A spouse or a child will only have known us in our later years.

But God has been with us each and every moment.

He has been with us from the beginning.

God reminds Jeremiah that He knew him before he was born.

^“The word of the Lord came to me, saying,    

 “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you,                                                                   before you were born I set you apart;
I appointed you as a prophet to the nations.”  Jeremiah 1: 4-5 (NIV)

Luke reminds us that God notices everything about us, even down to the hairs on our heads.

“What’s the price of two or three pet canaries? Some loose change, right?

 But God never overlooks a single one. And He pays even greater attention to you, 

down to the last detail—even numbering the hairs on your head!  Luke 12: 6-7 (MSG)

God does not need Life 360 to know where we are.  He knows our every move.

“You have searched me, Lord,

    and you know me.

You know when I sit and when I rise;

    you perceive my thoughts from afar.

You discern my going out and my lying down;

    you are familiar with all my ways.

Before a word is on my tongue

    you, Lord, know it completely.”

 Psalm 139: 1-4 (NIV)

Every. Single. Detail.

Going back to Proverbs 14:10, the wisdom in this verse can be summed up in this quote:

“Each man is a little world in himself, which God only fully sees through and understands.” Keil and Delitzsch Biblical Commentary on the Old Testament

Disappointment is born when we expect others to fully know us like our Creator does.

How many times have you felt overlooked or unseen by others?

How many times have you looked to others to fill a void that only He can fill?

Friends, I don’t pretend to fully know your joys and sorrows.

But I know what it feels like to be discouraged.

The greatest encouragement comes from knowing the One who created us and spending time in His presence.

Even when you feel like no one notices, God always does.

No matter how many times you feel adrift, He  knows exactly where you are.

When you are feeling discouraged, you find encouragement and hope in His Word.

And if you are like me and need that reminder,  grab a sister or brother in faith to talk with and pray.

To the sister who sat across the table from me and listened to my heart, I know that He was speaking to me through you.

Blessings in heaps.